A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:As we all know, most women have one breast which is ever so slightly larger than the other. No natural woman is perfectly symmetrical. A small percentage of us women, however, develop rather assymetrical and the difference is very noticable. Unfortunately, I am one of those women. I'm 20 now and my breasts are roughly two sizes apart. I've talked with doctors, as it is a genuine difference that warrants correction, and have been told that there is no definitive rhyme or reason. Some women just develop this way. I have two normal breasts. It is just that one is rather round and a full C, but my other is a little under a B and is more conical. If I wear a proper bra, it really isn't very noticable. If you are looking hard enough, there is a slight visable difference through clothes. Under the clothes, though, it is painfully obvious.Needless to say, this is a major self-esteem issue. I've been dealing with this since puberty and it always makes intimacy and thoughts of intimacy slightly scary. It is a real damper always in my mind. The only way to correct my issue is surgery with implants. However, after meeting with a few surgeons last year, I decided I was far too fearful of the possible health consequences (capsular contracture, leakage, replacement). Id rather live with my issue for now than risk my health. That is a little easier said than done, though. I have only seriously dated one guy. I never took my shirt off with him. I always was pushing him away from my chest, especially the smaller side. Finally he asked me what my problem was and I just told him I was slightly different in size and embarrassed by it. He shrugged it off. My problem is that I have recently started dating someone new and we are becoming serious.I want to be intimate with him, but I worry so much of him thinking I'm a freak. Of course, he does absolutely nothing to make me feel this way. He is very sexually attracted to me, but we are going super slow. He's seen me in my bra, but in dim light. I've let him feel me up, but i always take control and direct his hands where I want them. I don't know what to do. I feel like I need to tell him my issue, but I fear his response. He says he is in love with me and I rationally know he will likely not dump me on the spot or be disgusted with me, but I can't help thinking he will. How should I approach this and get over my intimacy issues? I don't want to mess up another relationship and the bottom line is that I want to be comfortable and intimate.
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female
reader, Orbiter  +, writes (21 July 2011):
I agree that you should tell him about this, so he knows just how uncomfortable you are with it. Hopefully when you see he's not going to leave you over it and is not bothered by it (like the first guy who shrugged it off) then maybe it'll help you relax when something intimate happens.
I'm sure you're rationally aware of this but maybe it'll help to hear it from someone else.....if a guy actually loves you then he will not care at all that one of your breasts is bigger than the other and seriously why would anyone think it's disgusting just to have different sized breasts?
Most women have a part of their body they're very self conscious about but with experience and age, you'll begin to see that actually it's not very important at all. Just keep reminding yourself that he loves you and when he tells you that it doesn't bother him, don't think about it any more than that. Just accept that's how he feels, doubting that is just you projecting your own insecurities onto him and it's not the truth of the matter.
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