A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello, is this justified?I can't drink, and I have a very good memory. So if someone does something stupid, I would remember it for a very long time. Because of this, my boyfriend doesn't take me along when he goes drinking with his friends (both male + female). I usually get kind of pissy when he comes home (he's kind of obnoxious when he is drunk and tries to get me to have sex with him, and when I reject him, he gets sulky), because I'm bitter that he never takes me with him. When I say never, I mean I have gone once in about 20+ social events in the last year. Anyway, I'm wondering if my boyfriend's actions are justified and understandable. Would you take along your girlfriend (who can't drink without getting sick) when you go out and have fun? When you know that she will remember everything stupid that you did?
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female
reader, VSAddict  +, writes (22 July 2011):
 Your boyfriend is unjustified. People have certain preferences on everything and he can't exclude you because they don't go along with his. There are plenty of reasons why you two are together and you care for one another. Just because you don't drink doesn't mean that he shouldn't spend time with you. Drinking isn't everything. It's great that you choose not to drink. You can be sober with your head on your shoulders and you'll always be prepared when your boyfriend's acting like a fool. Don't give in to this. If he can't accept it, then he needs to learn to. Is he doing other activities with you during the day or willing to do something that you enjoy? He shouldn't have to be asked to, but if he's not, then ask him to give up some of his drinking days/nights for you. But he needs to get over himself. He's destroying his liver and brain cells with every drink and he shouldn't be mad because you choose to be the responsible one in the relationship. He could be also but he chooses not to, so whose fault is it other than his? If he's going to keep making a big deal out of it, then maybe you want to reconsider being with someone who doesn't accept your preferences.
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