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female
,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend moved away from me 1 year ago. I am 22, he is 24. After he graduated from university, he applied for a job and got one 3 hours from where I live. We were living together and had been together a year before he left. I think I am still a little resentful toward him for moving because I see it as him leaving me at a time when we were so happy together. He could have gotten a job where I live, but he didn't even look. At the time when he applied for the job, he didn't really tell me about it until he had gotten the job (and he was moved out 3 weeks later). I know that he loves me a lot but I still feel like he left me behind...and it all happened a year ago! I find myself whining on the phone to him about it still and it has been making him really upset. Should I just get over it? I feel like he wasn't even thinking about our relationship when he left. He actually admitted that he was thinking about himself. What does this mean? Am I being completely selfish here?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2005):
He wanted to tone down the relationship. Not every college romance can last... that doesn mean you're selfish or he's selfish.
A
female
reader, beenthere +, writes (12 December 2005):
you are not being selfish. he is. he had no thought for you or the relationship when he left. let him know that he needs to find something closer if the relationship is to continue. long distance love can work but not permanently
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