A
female
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anonymous
writes:When somebody close to you annoys you, is it best to tell them and get it out in the open? I find it hard to talk about stuff like that and my best mate has been really annoying me lately. It frustrates me a lot and maybe this is made worse because I keep it all inside, I don't want any friction between us. Is it ok to keep it all in and smile until someone stops being so annoying or should I say something? I do it with other people too, then hours later, am mad at myslef, going over all the things I should've said! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2006): This depends on the person receiving your words. For me, I'll tell them that they're annoying me despite who they are. The key action is 'tact'. The thing is also, I am not afraid of speaking my mind if they are close to me. They should well understand their annoyances upon me - if not, I'll remind them.
A
female
reader, anon2907  +, writes (21 August 2006):
 Hey, you're learning a valuable life lesson here - to say something or to keep it in????? If there was one simple answer to this I wish someone would tell me!!
Sometimes it is best to let things go. Other times it's best to confront them. My advice would be to go with your gut instinct. If someone's challenging things you fundamentally believe in, or challenging your integrity, I'd say stand up for yourself and say so.
As far as being annoying is concerned, you may have to be more specific about what it is exactly that's annoying you?
Whatever option you choose though, there's no need to be mad at yourself. You should be proud that you didn't react impulsively to their behaviours. You can alwways bring these annoyances up at a later time and say to the person 'what you did really annoyed me because.....' and see what they have to say, without it being a heat of the moment exchange.
Good luck with whichever option you go for. If you want to tell us what is annoying you exactly, we might be able to be more specific with advice.
take care,
: ))
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