A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am a lusty college sophomore, and I have cheated on my last two boyfriends. Both were not really serious, the last one was about 3 months and the one I'm in now is at about 3 months. I told the last guy that I cheated and broke up with him because I felt bad, it was an LDR so then we ended up just fooling around for weeks not really committing. This relationship I'm in now, I made out with a guy at a party and then when my boyfriend picked me up I broke down and told him because I felt so bad, and we worked it out and moved past it. Now at 3 months, I've been unsure about this guy and last night at a party I danced and fooled around with a guy and ended up having sex with him. I am not going to tell my boyfriend.My Question is, am I just a cheater? Can I never be trusted again? I feel like if I was really in love with the guy I wouldn't feel the need to cheat, but both guys that I was with and cheated on just weren't giving me what I needed, either because it was LDR, or because this guy I have now doesn't like to have sex as much as me! I don't feel as bad as I think I should, and I'm just confused by it. I don't feel like a bad person, I'm smart, funny, and a very nice person; should I feel that my promiscuous nature is my 'fatal flaw'? I do not want it to define me, should I find a guy interested in an open relationship?
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): "should I feel that my promiscuous nature is my 'fatal flaw'"
Only if you want that, and you won't want it in the long run. The question is "why" are you promiscuous, and not only promiscuous but "why" do you cheat.
Cheating means something, even if the betrayed person never knows.
Get some understanding of yourself.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOP here: appreciate the advice, you all are right.
Rainer: preparing what I will say, its the hardest part. Vday tomorrow and his birthday in a couple of weeks... I really do enjoy his time soo so much, but indeed I want to go out and party and meet other people and it isn't fair to him.
Anon male: I'm not going to pretend like you are wrong, and that is a great analogy, really makes me think.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2011): Your not ready for a boyfriend. Go out and live the single life, and stay single for as long as you need, so you stop hurting people! You should feel bad, and your wrecking your self reputation. Tell this boy you're with the truth because he will find out eventually, and he deserves better than that. I would not say you're a bad person, if you can learn from your mistakes.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2011): Your description of your reasoning sounds sort of like a shoplifter who says: "Well, I don't feel guilty about stealing because none of these stores haved wanted to sell me exactly what I want for the price I felt like paying at the time."
...............................
|
