A
female
age
36-40,
*abygirl99
writes:I recently started conversating with a nice guy 2 weeks ago . The only problems I have with him is he just got out of a 7yr marriage like a month ago. So his back living at home with his mom no job really just sit at home and babysit his two kids ! Kind of sad . His trying to get on his feet but I don't want him to get serious with me . He calls me all day and if I tell him I'm going to call him back he beats me to it. It's getting to the point it drives me when he calls . I had to explain to him that his coming off to strong on me and I do not want to be a rebound his still married ! How do I tell him to slow down on the phone calls ? Half of the time when he do call I just let the phone ring b/c I need a break ! His really nice but his scaring me off ! I had to lie to him and tell him my voice was gone for a day ! Just so I can get a break from him ! Help me !!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2010): Well, as you know, he is fresh out of separating from his wife, and presumably thinking about divorce. Plus no job, living with his mother and baby-sitting his children most of the time.
It would be a miracle were he not confused, depressed, and searching desperately for a bit of companionship. But he's going about it the wrong way. He needs to take time - lots of time - to think about getting work, and being on his own before trying for another relationship.
If you have already (and of course you have) told him he's coming on too strong (which he is) and you want him to cut way back on the phone calls, which he is not doing, you have no choice but to tell him you're a busy woman and you're not going to pick up the phone - not only because its all too much, but ALSO for his own good! Encourage him to get together with other guys, get some counseling, and then follow through on ignoring him!
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