A
male
age
51-59,
*irius70
writes:I am just a over 40 and have never been on a date with a woman. I think finally, I am starting to conquer my anxiety and other issues, which tend to make me a hermit. I want this to work so badly because I want a little of fun in my joyless life. Trust me, I will never be a parent, I don't know if I will ever marry but if I can have some useful advice it will mean the world to meThanks in advance. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2012): Are you kidding me? You are hot commodity out there. Do you know how many single desperate women are out there?? Especially in their 30's who would love to have a guy with no baggage (ex wives/kids)! Time to start dating, keep your dating history to yourself in the early months of dating someone...go live life & drop that attitude that you have a 'joyless life'. life is what you make of it, despite bad past experiences and/or mental issues. Its your choice how you live life. Go have fun! & go watch "40 year old virgin" :)
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (24 February 2012):
 I think you shouldn't go it alone. You have internal issues that have blocked you from dating for at least 25 years, and force of will alone isn't enough, though I commend you on that force of will, because it got you to write here for advice. So, you're going in the right direction.
Have you seen someone in regards to your anxiety and stuff? Going on dates and connecting with women (or people in general, if your hermit ways have kept you from everyone) when you've had problems will only be accomplished in baby steps, and you'd do well guided by someone trusted. Yes, I mean talk to someone professional, but instead of connecting it with the stigma of "therapy" or "counselor", think of it like you would a workout. Working out seems so much easier with a workout buddy. Likewise, think of the therapist as a "workout buddy" for your inner wellness.
You are entitled to fun. You *are* dateable, and you are worth a woman getting to know. Take it one tiny step at a time, talk to someone, and you'll find yourself capable of things you think you've given up on!
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