| A
male
,
*hredordie
writes: Help! I'm think I'm going nuts. My ex-girlfriend and I have been broken up for almost 3 months and I can' t get her out of my head. Sometimes I'm fine, but today I saw her and her rebound guy together and now I feel like I'm right back where I started. I still love her, and I find myself picking apart her current relationship and trying to come up with reasons why it won't work.1.) The guy's just not her type (well, I like to think this anyway, considering their very different tastes, personalities, backgrounds, etc.)2.) She started seeing this guy almost immediately after we broke up, and literally, the day after we had a fight.3.) They almost seem more like friends than lovers. When I was going out with her we were very passionate but I don't get that vibe from these two. 4.) She will go out to hang out at her friends' places late at night and will end up crashing there. Or she'll drink a lot at a friends party and stay the night. While she doesn't do anything or cheat on the guy (I don't think anyway), I wonder why she would do this if she is serious about their relationship.5.) I know this is probably because of me lol, but she never brings him around parties or places that I will be at. This guy hasn't met any of our mutual friends.6.) When me and her hang out, the chemistry is fantastic.So, does this sound like a recipe for disaster for these two? I really want to wait around for her to come back to me, I can't help but think that we are meant to be. However, on days like to day, it drives me nuts. All your thoughts and advice are greatly appreciated! This site has been a great help for me!
View related questions:
broke up, ex girlfriend, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2006): Ok - In my opinion I dont think there is anything wrong with making a list - but probably not one that focuses on why her new boyfriend is wrong for her. You would be better writing a list of 'To Do's' which give you some steer on what you are going to do with your life beyond this relationship. Secondly write down all the things you argued about, disagreed on, disliked about her and re-read it. Was she really right for you? Could you spend the rest of your life with her? If you still think she is - and that she is making a mistake with this new guy, then by all means keep in touch with her - but don't however analyse whether their relationship is going to fail, as you could be waiting some time, which would be better spent checking out the other women on offer.
A
male
reader, shredordie +, writes (9 May 2006):
shredordie is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks man. Yeah, sorry I was just having one of those down moments. I'm going to try to distance myself as best I can.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2006): Holy crap, just don't bother with these analyses - they will only make you more upset. Maybe these two are wrong for each other, but your girlfriend is a grown woman and can stand to make a few mistakes in her life. Even if they don't stay together, that doesn't mean that she will necessarily fall back into your arms either. You need to stop worrying about her and focus more on yourself, and doing things that will make YOU happy. This could mean diving back into the dating pool or even pursuing other interests that you neglected while coupled. In any case, you need to work on creating a little distance from her new relationship, since it clearly distresses you. If you feel some impulse to analyze it, stop, because the more you obsess about it, the worse you'll feel.
...............................
|
