A
male
age
36-40,
*lamingo
writes:Hello everyone. I have a feeling towards this one person. A young woman. She's a senior at the school that I attend. I am a sophmore and we share a class together. I can never work up the courage to go talk to her. Although one day she did come up to me. She wanted to help me get a bass drum rhythm right (during band class). I had no idea what to do... she had just came up to like that. My head was spinning when she walked away. Well about her... she's a very sweet, kind person. To top it off she's deeply religious and she pulls away from (in my opinion) idiotic activities that many in age engage in. She'a very beautiful, but she's never had a boyfriend before! So many guys in my class can easily go up to her and talk to her. It's very frustrating seeing them be able to talk to her so freely. I really don't know what to do. What can I say to this person? I really don't know much about her, but it feels like my heart is already attached to her. And then the pain I feel when I know that she won't be in my school any more (next year shes heading off to college). I don't want to go up to her and flirt with her. I want to create a relationship where she can talk to me whenever she wants. If we could have a love relationship that would be great. I don't care which one it is. I just want to see her happy but I want to be in her life. It's like shes the sun and I'm the earth. forever bound. If you can give me suggestions it would be great. Thanks for reading this. I guess I used this as a way to express what I feel. My best friend told me there were millions of girls out in the world. I really don't care. I want her.Thank you for reading this,-Flamingo
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Uncle Chaos  +, writes (31 March 2009):
 Hi Flamingo,
It’s obvious that you really like this girl, so the only way you’re going to get anywhere is by talking to her.
Take some time to calm yourself down before you talk to her. Take some deep breaths and relax, she's a person, not a bomb. She's not going to explode.
You want to get to know her?
Does she know your name? If not introduce yourself. Tell her that you would like to get to know her better.
Just because she’s a girl and you fancy her, it doesn’t mean you have to flirt with her.
Start small, try to find things you have in common, music and films are always a safe way to go.
You said she’s going to college, which one? What’s she studying when she’s there? There’s a million things you can ask.
When you do talk to her don’t come on to strong, it can be intimidating, but at the same time be confident. You seem to be a really nice guy, let her see that.
Flirting can come later, you need to know if she is the kind of person you could spend a lot of time with.
You said that you want to be in a relationship where she feels she can talk to you at any time. Be aware that if you become a close friend you may find yourself talking to her about guys she likes, and from past experience I know that it can be awkward and sometimes painful as well.
If you do start off as friends and you begin to get stronger feelings for her, you need to let her know how you feel; it’s no good bottling it up. It’s better to have these things out in the open.
It’s cool to see a guy who cares enough about someone that they put the other person’s happiness above their own. It seems to be really rare these days. Don’t lose that.
Good luck
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