A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Maybe this is a stupid question, I don't know. My boyfriend is 28 and I am 21; we have been dating about 8 months. Lately he and I have been having problems in our relationship, mainly communications but some other things also. A couple days ago we sat down to talk it out and come up with what we both could work on and out of the blue he goes "You could start wearing make-up."I was like, "What the hell?!" For one thing it didn't really relate to the issue at hand and for another, I was frankly offended by it. I never wear makeup around him or anyone else and haven't in YEARS, so it's not like I used to do it for him but am now "letting myself go" or anything like that. I have a couple reasons that for not wearing it and I think they're valid reasons but, I need a second opinion so I'm hoping aunts and uncles can help me out here.1) Not allowed to wear makeup for my job, which I had long before I had the boyfriend so I was already out of the habit.2) I just had eye surgery about a month ago and the docs all advise against wearing eye makeup for quite a while afterward because it increases the risk of infection and is hard to take off without rubbing the eyes. BF is completely aware of this, by the way3) I don't freakin' WANT to wear makeup. I think I look fine without it. I don't think I should have to put crap all over my face to be attractive to someone.Basically what I want to know is if I'm being reasonable to be annoyed by the request. Maybe I'm overreacting but I resent it to the point that it's almost a deal breaker for me. He's not Mr. Perfect in terms of how he looks but I accept that and am not trying to change him. It's not like I sat him down and said "You know, our relationship would improve if you started going to the gym to get rid of the 15 extra pounds around your middle."Am I crazy? I'm pissed! Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009): I'm happy to dress up for him, and I do, but makeup annoys me. To "satindesire": actually, he has kept the exact same hair and clothing style since I met him and I'm 100% okay with that because I'm not out to change him. All I ask from him is the same respect in return.
I don't get acne so I don't need concealer; the only time my skin breaks out is if I wear makeup.
Basically, thanks for the responses, but those of you who insist that I should wear makeup to make him happy overlooked the fact that it's a health issue because of my eyes. I think that puts a slightly different spin on the situation.
A
female
reader, sappygirl +, writes (23 May 2009):
 I disagree with some of the comments here.
You should only put make up on to make YOU
feel good. Do it for you and not for him.
If he doesn't like how you are now.. Then screw him.
Tell him, sorry this is me and if you don't like it, take a hike!!
One day you may want to get dollyed up an be girlie, but
right now in your post you sound like a smart girl who knows what she wants!
Be strong an be happy and love yourself. If he doesn't like it, I bet
ten guys will be waiting in line for a natural beauty who doesn't pile
on a tons of makeup. I completely agree with you!!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2009): well u know how guys can get,they want their girls to look all dolled up for them
more like showing u off and to say proudly to their homies that u belong to them
well since u dont want to use make up then its your choice but i think once in a while u could dress up for him just to make him feel special and all the effort is for him..
...............................
|
