A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Two weeks ago, I met a girl near my age (25) and we connected right away on the first date that lasted from 7 PM to 1 AM. It included talking, laughing and talking some more. The subsequent dates were also quite intimate and we ended up holding hands. She was the first to make the move to kiss me that same night (3rd date). She also let me sleep over in the platonic sense twice. However, 1 week later, she has been A) Not replying to my phone messages for as long as a few days--even when she tells me to call her that day to schedule a dateB) Postponing datesC) Claimed to forget about an important movie date that I reminded her twice aboutD) Uses excuses like she's "too tired" or "went to the hospital emergency room" or "my mom is staying over a few days"Whenever we're physically together, she's quite warm to me, held my hand, made out, laughed, talked about places she'd like me to take her, etc...The last time I saw her was Tuesday and I kept my distance from her, but she eventually made out with me and we held hands and talked again for 2 hours. She told me to call her on Wednesday for a date that night, but then postponed it to Friday and told me to call her then, but she never picked up and hasn't returned the call yet. How should I confront her about what's REALLY going on? What do YOU think is REALLY going on with her? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2008): Where to start...you have soo many problems going on here. Firstly shes not your girlfriend, enless you have gone out for at least 20 dates. So your not going out with her, your stringing yourself along.
You must be really inexperienced, which isnt a bad thing but so far you have shown her your not a man whose willing to make decisions, your a guy who lacks confidence and comes across as needy(which makes girls go running for the hills). I am getting this from the shocking fact that she had to initiate the kiss on the 3rd date... next time you lean in and kiss the girl on the first date(top tip - no tongue), if you dont get a kiss back move on.
Solution :
The girls disrespected you by postponing alot. She had her chance i would move on, because at the moment you have given her a low opinion of yourself and what your times worth.
If she does contact you again and you want something to happen then give her the gift of wanting you, dont reply straight away or try to have a conversation over a text message. Pull the joey line 'how you doing ?', when she replies suggest going for coffee to catch up, a film...
then say ill see you then(and stop texting). The other point is you decide on what your doing, stop looking for her approval on everything or her to make decisions. If she doesnt like something she will tell you.
The signs are it might be too late, never get angry about it ... remember she was interested enough to you to go out with her. Learn from this, when you see her dont avoid her just treat say hey any move on(no more , nothing to see here).
Bottom line be more of a man! Open doors for girls but also show them your physically attracted to them..otherwise they'll walk away !!!!!
- well thats my 2cents
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