A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My b/f and I broke up mainly due to an outside event. An ex fiance of 6 months ago who when he found out i was happy and with someone else keep staulking me. My b/f told me to get a restraining order but I did not and he thought I was being disrepectful. Well anyway months have passed since we have broken up. Since then he alluded to us going out...but now he wants to be best buddies. He calls to see how I am doing, etc. I still love him and I really think he loves me ... I am usually a very good read on people. Before the incident he wanted me to move in I had the key to his house - he really did alot for me. He is not friends with any of his other ex-girlfriends so why does he want to be with me? I did drive him a bit crazy w/ text messages which was wrong. He does not like controversy of any sort and can be stubborn and has tendencies to retreat. My question is he over me? He had kept suggesting about doing thngs but not lately. Although he keeps calling to see how I am. Did he meet someone else? Do I just keep things light and friendly and give him space? I really love him. I just talked to him today and he says he is working vey hard and tired. I told him I need a vacation and he says he does to. Should I just wait until he contacts me again? We really got along perfectly before the staulker. I never felt this way before and I am not young! we had dinner 2 weeks ago and the way that he looks at me and how acts it really seems that he loves me. He had said that he revolved his whole life around me and then the staulker came and we both were hurt. Help? How much time do I give him?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Stephen Stewart Nixon  +, writes (27 June 2009):
 You need to get to the bottom of the situation and discuss what you are thinking and feeling with the person in question. It is the only way to find out where you are with your "relationship". If it isn't going anywhere you need to know so you can spend your precious time and energy else where. Ask him to be honest with you because even if you don't get the answers you hoped for at least you will know where you stand. I Hope this helps
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