A
female
age
26-29,
*ostlizzie
writes:Why do i feel like i want a boyfriend? Its fustrating because i don't even have feelings for anyone, and i haven't for quite a while. Is this just part of being a teen? What can i do about this? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2013): Hi!
What the last answer said is true- it's human nature to look for a life partner and crave companionship. However, I find our sort of generation are really into this whole dating thing too young- I'm 22 , not much older than you, but when I was 12/ 13 and even at the first year of secondary- people left, right, centre were "eloping" haha, so&so's seeing this person, that person is that other person's ex- EH? Haha until about 15 I saw myself as pretty much asexual - as my friend comically puts it " a spider plant..." Lol!
- I just didn't get it! Why is everyone rushing into "relationships"- cos if you want a boyfriend, you're guna have to get get your head around that word! Anyway point I'm making is that these days, everything seems so rushed and it's easy to give in to these feelings of wanting to conform- if everyone else is doing it, they're getting this exciting new fun thing-
But relationships are not to be taken lightly... They're a serious emotional/ psychological minefield- there are SO many efforts and emotions and insecurities that come with them, they're a killer of a challenge, as tim bisley would say -
you know what they say about love and war-
One involves a lot of psychological and physical pain- the other's war!
Sorry just a fun anecdote there ;)
Anyway my advice- don't look for it, put it off until you REALLY like someone- not a relationship for the sake of a relationship, it's just not worth the hassle in my opinion. Nows the time to explore a d really pursue your interests- if you like music, learn am instrument, you like art/ science, think about serious courses that will put you on track for your dream job, anything you love. I'm not meaning to sound patronising btw, I wish I'd made better career choices really :/
Write these feelings down, burn them and put it at the back of your mind for now, just spend time meeting people, developing trust and connections, exploring your potential, you'll be fine! :)
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (10 June 2013):
 Don't worry, you're totally normal. It's part of being a teen, but it's also just part of being human. Most people want companionship, they want a partner and that kind of connection.
What you DON'T want to do is date some guy just because you're bored or you're lonely. You should only date people that you're actually excited about! Otherwise relationships really aren't that much fun. Wait until you find someone you're interested in and then you might find the kind of relationship that you're looking for!
Don't worry, sweetness. Relax. Don't worry about going into the world searching for a boyfriend. Just embrace this part of you that thinks it'd be nice to have a fella, and know that when the time is right you'll have one. Good luck! :)
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