A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend moved in with me about a month ago after 9 months of dating. Three days ago, he told me that he was going to sleep over his best friend's house, whom I have known for about 6 months. His best friend, had been to our apartment a few times and have slept over twice. I was bothered and confused by the fact that he was going to sleep over his friend's house. He asked me if it bothered me and I said that in my previous relationship, neither my ex or I, ever slept outside of our home, but that I couldn't stop him. I feel very different about him now. As if something just died between us. I explained to him how I was feeling, and he just told me that maybe this is an opportunity for us to start all over again. However, I can't stop feeling hurt by him sleeping outside of his home. It is fine for a guy to do that?
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female
reader, LiveAnnLearn  +, writes (10 September 2010):
 Yes of course it is fine, just put yourself in his shoes, would you feel it's ok that he's stopping you from doing something you like just because you moved in together and should it even change things. As long as he's not doing something you both agreed not to do, like cheating on each other, he has the right to do whatever he wants and I do agree it's a bit clingy of you to say "something died" just because he is.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2010): Don't want to stir anything up unnecessarily, but I had that happen and found out my bf was bisexual.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2010): What's the big deal? Are you really that needy that you need him with you 24/7. Just because you are his gf doesn't mean he can't have a social life. Seriously, you say something "died" i think you are being mellow dramatic and sounding clingy.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2010): Does it make a difference if neither the boyfriend or best friend drive? And, if they are going to be drinking, why can he come home after that? Or, why can they both come to where he lives with his girlfriend, and have the party?
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (9 September 2010):
 I personally see no problem with that. I'm with eyeswideopen that I'm assuming this friend is a guy and that they'll probably be drinking. I've crashed at friends houses plenty of times. I don't get how him sleeping somewhere else could hurt so bad. It's like little kids having a slumber party. Does his friend live far away? That's another reason to stay. Do you always have to be together to be happy?
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (9 September 2010):
 Are they going to be drinking? If so better he stays the night than drive home drunk. Of course I'm assuming this friend is a guy.
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A
female
reader, almc  +, writes (9 September 2010):
Why is he sleeping there? If he is having a guys night out and drinking, then I don't see why not don't want him to drinkg and drive. Just have a girls night out, or stay in and watch movies, have fun and don't worry. You trust him right?!?
Good luck.
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