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Is he just keeping his options open?

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 October 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 14 October 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I need a advise..I've been dating this guy for about...4 months now..and he shows all the signs that he's really into me..calls just to see how my day is

Funny,nice,romantic, I feel silly but cuddles after sex..looks into my eyes tells me I'm beautiul. He introduced me to his guy friends..we hang out. When he kisses and holds me it feels so different from my past relationships it feels real

Problem is...he's never mad us official..what is he waiting on? He's never asked me to be his girlfriend...I don't get it..we talk every single day

he's just never kinda worries is he keeping his options open?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2009):


I agree with Good Girl. I would like to add that maybe he thinks that it is obvious that you two are together! Maybe he thinks that he has shown you in all the ways possible and really what could be more clearer than meeting his friends! So. But, if you still have doubts and you want to be clear about where you stand... ask him whether he is dating others girls. After 4 months together you have that right. And, I think that it is high time you know just where you are. When you have been having a really nice time, and you are alone, just ask him like, "hey, we've known each other for 4 months and I am really happy with you..." and then ask him.

Hope for the Best

Love :)

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A female reader, midnightlover United States +, writes (14 October 2009):

Are you willing to keep the relationship as is? If you're not then perhaps it's time for you to confront him directly. Ask him straight out what his plans for you are...then see whether or not the relationship continues in the same vein.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2009):

Four months, even though it feels like forever to you is not a long time... Guys are scared of commitment-every guy is unless he is some dorky guy who cant get any. So dont think thats weird, but if youre having sex with him and he is cuddling with you after that doesnt really mean anything he might just enjoy human touch. I dont want to sound like a debbie downer but you should be careful, and dont give him everything you have, keep him holding on by making him want something he cant have... Everyone wants what they cant have. And a tip my mom told me my whole life, "always let him like you a little bit more." I hope i helped sorry if i seemed harsh. Good luck! :)

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A female reader, Good Girl United States +, writes (14 October 2009):

Good Girl agony auntSounds like he's really into you actually. Some people just don't like to put labels on everything. If you want to know if he plans on seeing you exclusively, just ask him. Don't get defensive about it though. He probably thinks things are going good and doesn't want to ruin it by putting it in the confines of something that can be described by a few words such as "boyfriend" or "girlfriend". Try to talk to him about it a little, but remember to tell him while you are talking that you are really, really enjoying the way you are spending your time together! Guys love to be told that they are doing a good job. If they think they're doing something wrong they pull away fast so always let him know you appreciate all the little ways he shows you his affection. Look into his eyes lovingly and often. After all talk is cheap. It's actions that say everything. Enjoy!

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