A
female
age
51-59,
*ioletSparkle
writes:Hello, I really need a suggestion: this guy I met on an online dating site, we exchanged a few emails, no more than once a day, then he asked me out and we met, but several days before the date and after no communication. First date was awkward but nice, and the day after he wrote (on the dating website) and asked again. Asked my friendship on facebook and linkedin, (actually he did that before the first date), and gave me his phone number. Second date, after two weeks, a bit short (3 hours), but I thought we connected, and right after he sent a message on facebook: let's do it again. Note that he has my phone number by now. I don't answer immediately, but I inquire about his flu, and he asks me out again (still facebook) - again in two weeks, because he has kids one week on two. Then we exchange a few lines each for some days, but it goes back to the meeting, no extra conversation. No chat. No phone calls. Now I really like this guy, but I suspect a) that he is not that interested b) for some reason that is the max of communication he wants to have with a woman. Do I want too much because I want a miserable phone call? How long do I wait before moving to more communicative pastures? Third date is in one week and I am tempted to cancel it.. PS the two times that I initiated a communication, chat and facebook, was really not encouraging, because he wouldn't answer for a couple of days, so I don't think I ll do it again
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female
reader, VioletSparkle +, writes (20 March 2011):
VioletSparkle is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyou are right, it shouldn't be too much work in the beginning, he was after one thing only.. (he didn't get it, ah)
A
female
reader, TheFurFiles  +, writes (6 March 2011):
 First of all, some people just hate talking on the phone. I am one of them. Two, it sounds as if he is busy (kids?), and I am assuming you are as well. If two people REALLY like each other and they are single, there should be no reason why they can't get together. Relationships in the beginning shouldn't be too much work. That comes later LOL. If you really want to find out what is what, I'd call him. See what happens. If it is awkward or if he just sort of brushes you off, you'll know that it probably won't go anywhere. In fact, maybe he is waiting for you to call. Maybe he doesn't want to be too pushy. I think you'll be able to judge his intentions/excitement/interest by how he responds. Just do it. Take the bull by the horns. Grab the reins. Take the plunge. Then you'll know for sure. Good luck. Fern (TheFurFiles)
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