| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: Dear CupidI have been with my husband now for 10 years although we did not get married until recently, but lately our marriage has been going through a rocky patch and we argue about everything! When we me i wasnt really interested in him but he grew on me and wooed me and i eventually agreed to a relationship. In the heat of an argument we always seem to agree that we are together simply for the sake of our 5 year old child. There is also a 20 year age gap between us (I am now 37) and I am beginning to feel that we don't have much in common and that the gap is widening.Anyway a few months ago I met someone through my line of work we get on really well together and i feel that we both share this strong "chemistry" and I feel very comfortable around him. Nothing romantic is happening between us at present, were just good friends/colleagues, but I think about him a lot and my heart literally aches when i am not with him. I sense he feels the same way but the problem is he is also married and although I sense he has feelings for me, I get mixed messages because he always mentions his wife in our conversation. I think his is putting his gaurd up. I have tried fighting these feelings but they wont go away I feel that we are soul mates and that we are destined to be together. I have never had these feelings for anyone before in my entire life. What can I do?. Please help these feelings are killing me!.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (14 November 2006):
Well, think about this. All those feelings you have for him, so does his wife, and she's married to him. She's entitled to feel that way. You're in a troubled marriage and have decided to put a little trouble in his marriage by taking a step down the wrong path. You'll start by looking good when you leave the house, for him. You'll flatter him and act like a teenager around him. You'll seduce him by your actions and start him down the wrong path too. Cast your fishing line in another pond, if you catch this guy, you're catching a cheater. I don't think a relationship built by two cheaters is very secure.
If you don't want to be with your husband, do the honourable thing and leave. Then you're free to do as you please. I can't understand why people always convince themselves to do things backwards.
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