A
male
age
36-40,
*oloSW
writes:My potential girlfriend lives a long way away and she wants me to come up and visit her soon, within a month or so. But the problem is that I have no job and can't afford an airline ticket. I am currently looking for a job but I'm not having much luck. I'm really worried, I'm not sure she will wait for me much longer, our relationship can't move anywhere until we meet. What can I do?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 November 2011):
 well if you find a job where you are and she has one where she is...who will move? because LDRs cannot exist without a plan to END the LDR part..
maybe it's best that you two remain just friends till you get your life in better order?
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (30 November 2011):
 That's quite a distance. Is she on board with the whole LDR idea?? Is she willing to commit to that? How did you guys meet??
It's going to be difficult to find a job in this economy, let alone come the first of the year when everyone starts cutting back. I would just remain avid about finding a job, shooting out your resume, networking with your friends, and seeing if someone knows of anyone hiring. You may not get exactly what you're looking for, so be open to settling for less. Find a job first which will allow you the funds to see your potential girlfriend.
Explain your financial situation to her and see if she could come out to you.
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A
male
reader, SoloSW +, writes (29 November 2011):
SoloSW is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTo clarify, we have been dating long distance for 2 months now, and we have a lot in common and get along very well. She lives in NYC and I live in New Mexico. I need money for airfare to go up and see her so that we can decide if this can become anything more. I lost my job and am desperately looking for one. We are both getting worried, we want to try and be together but we are not sure if it will ever be.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (29 November 2011):
how far apart are you?
how old is she?
how long have you been dating
like Tennisstar said you need to be able to spend time together in order to make this a viable relationship.
so what kind of money are we talking about? gas money?
air fare?
and at 26-29 why dont' you have a job and how are you paying your bills?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2011): Talk to her and explain your situation, I am sure she would understand, how difficult it is. Just be open and honest with her and then she is either willing to wait or not.
If she was really into you she would understand and wait for you or even offer to make the trip to see you, anything worth having takes nurturing, time and above all patience.
If both of you like each other that much you will work at developing a relationship and do everything possible to be together.
Good luck.x
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (29 November 2011):
I'm sorry, but what the hell is a potential relationship? Are you two still in the talking phase?
Can she come to you? Could you ask your parents for $$? The only other option you have is to get a job..Which you will need one if you're going to continue with this potential LDR. Travel is necessary in order for a LDR to work. Good luck with that.
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