A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:There's this guy I really like but I'm not sure if I'm sending him mixed signals or not being affectionate enough towards him. Let me explain, he's really affectionate towards me most of the time: taking my hand out of the blue, hugging me, kissing my cheek,touching my back...When he does all this I of course hug him back or take his hand...but sometimes I'll disengage myself quickly from the hug or worm my hand out of his grasp, or simply stay very still when he touches me. I like him, I really do, and I'm not sure if I'm 'playing the game' right...I've never been really good at this sort of thing.
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male
reader, Odds +, writes (14 November 2011):
 Yeah, it's totally fine if you initiate contact. You won't even lose your "shy" image over it, if you want to keep that. Especially hugging - plenty of people do that, so you don't have to worry about seeming to forward. And hand-holding is fairly innocent.
Just step a little outside your comfort zone at a time, and it'll expand to match.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2011): Thank you for replying :) I will try to do those things. Also, I was wondering, would it be ok for me to initiate contact? Take his hand, hug him... Usually he's the one that starts...
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (13 November 2011):
If you like it, show it! Otherwise, he'll think you're not interested. Hard-to-get is vastly overrated. If he holds your hand, give his a little squeeze, or lace the fingers up. If he hugs you hug him back and squeeze for just a few seconds longer. Lean into him a bit when he touches you instead of freezing up.
There's no shame in not getting that stuff right away; we're not born with this knowledge, after all. Don't be afraid to step a little outside your comfort zone, and don't worry about playing games, just about showing your interest.
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