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I'm afraid I don't know him!

Tagged as: Long distance, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 October 2010) 1 Answers - (Newest, 29 October 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Friends,

My boyfriend is in the Marines. We've been dating for four months now but have been best friends for going on 6 years. I thought I had always been in love with him so you can imagine my extreme happiness when we finally started dating. I also thought I knew everything about him but after a very long, and very revealing phone conversation, I realize I know nothing about the man he is today. He's changed from the boy I knew in high school and I feel he hides most of his life from me.

I know I'll never understand why he says the things he says, or acts a certain way or sometimes doesn't even want interaction with other people, myself included, after what he went through on his last deployment.

I feel like he's slipping away from me and I'm not sure that I'm devastated by it. I feel like being in a long distance relationship was silly and I was acting on emotions I felt years ago. We're in two totally different worlds right now and I feel like I have nothing in common with him because he refuses to let me into his life. When I've poured my heart out to him, he tells me he "doesn't know how to answer me". But he still tells me none of this makes him love me any less!

I'm just so confused as to what to do, I don't know if I should stay in a relationship with a man who might end up being the man of my dreams. I know he'd take amazing care of me if we were to get married and when he's home, our chemistry is out of this world. But over the past few months, I've been having second thoughts and I think he may be too. When I ask him about it, he denies it and says he loves me and hasn't been happier since we've been together.

I just don't know if I should risk other potential relationships for one man but I'm afraid I'll always regret letting him go. Do you think he's staying in a relationship for a comfort factor, to have someone to come home to? Would you stay together with someone who you feel you know nothing about if you thought you could have a bright future? Or would you move on and let fate take it's course?

Thanks everyone, peace.

View related questions: best friend, long distance, move on, my ex

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2010):

You already let him in, and He threw away both keys. Word of advice...~SUCK IT UP. HE'S THERE TO STAY~

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