A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey dear cupid.=)Well am a female 18, and i am in a serious relationship, my bf is 25 years olds and he loves me and respect, but the thing is i am too sturbon to listen to him and i dont realise dat am acting childish when am around him, he complains all the time about my behaviour, i dont wana loose him , and i need to change, but i cant always act the way he want me too, am trying my best..i want him to see that i have changed, he said he is tired and he has tried , i am afraid he will leave me if i dont change, and we have lots of plan in future..he sometimes said i act dum and stupid but i dont realise that, or is he just to mature for me or am the one with the problem here. Please help Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Janelle124 +, writes (24 July 2012):
Don't change for him! Be yourself and if he has a problem with that, Kick him to the curve. I've been in that situation, Its not fun... But don't change for him. Once you give him what he wants, he'll start thinking he'll always get his way. And you'll be stuck with that. I know it's hard cause you don't wanna lose him but sometimes you have to take that risk.... If he really loves you, he'll except you for who u are and he won't try to change you
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (24 July 2012):
 You can't change to please someone else.
You are who you are and his expectations may be unrealistic for you.
perhaps you two are just not a good fit
there's a bit of a difference between 18 and 25 anyway...
a lot of maturing goes on in those 7 years....
he should not call you dumb or stupid... that's abusive...
what specifically are you trying to change?
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A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (24 July 2012):
 This does not sound like a positive relationship for the two of you. If you are doing things that are disrespectful or inconsiderate towards him, I can understand him giving you ultimatums when it comes to your behavior. But, if there are things he doesn't like that are who you are as a person, then he doesn't have a right to ask you to change your personality. A lot of this could be maturity level too. I am not saying you are immature, but you and he may have different ways of looking at things and that could be causing a conflict. It isn't good if he is treating you like you're dumb. You don't want a relationship where your partner thinks you are dumb all the time.
Could you give us some examples of things he is unhappy with and ways in which he wants you to change? We might be able to get a better idea of what you are going through if we have some examples.
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