A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm a female, lately I've had mixed up feelings for a female friend, but the thing is that I've always liked guys. I've known her for few months and we became good friends, but I'm not sure why I'm having this feelings for her. I really don't want to have this feelings for her, but now I'm confused and I don't know what to think of myself. I can assure to you that I've always liked guys, I even had the greatest relationships I could ask for. I haven't dated for four years now and I really miss having a relationship.Am I just confused or does it really mean something?Thanks for your advice. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Dr. Mark  +, writes (13 April 2007):
Penta is right. There is no black and white. Just take your time and think of it as an adventure. You might learn more about yourself. Be patient with your friend, because if it is not mutual, you do not want to ruin your friendship. Women sometimes like to cuddle, and if you are careful, you can use that as an opportunity to see how she reacts to subtle touches. Take it slowly. Remember that you can still love her and not be physically intimate if she is not prepared for it. You can love her dearly and still like guys. There is nothing abnormal about it.
A
female
reader, penta  +, writes (9 April 2007):
 Human sexuality isn't black and white; it's gray with lots of shades in between. The Kinsey Scale (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinsey_scale) talks about how there are only a few who are COMPLETELY on either end of the specrtrum. This is normal.You may be having feelings for your friend. I wouldn't worry about it. Just continue being a friend. It probably won't go anywhere; chances are she doesn't return your feelings. If you just stay cool things will go the way they're meant to go.In any case, just having feelings for someone of the same gender doesn't make you 100 percent gay. Don't freak out.
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A
female
reader, Buddy  +, writes (9 April 2007):
Maybe because you haven't had a relationship for a while you are probably feeling a bit down and lonely wishing there was someone in your life and because you don't have a boyfriend you are feeling mixed feelings for your friend. We can all think our same sex friends attractive but it doesn't mean anything. On the other hand you could be bi sexual, do you find yourself checking out other women or just your friend? Ask yourself if a real handsome guy came up to you and asked you out, would you think of your friend?Hope this helps
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