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female
,
*razy_chick
writes: I have a very close boy mate at university, and we have been friends since first year, attended the annual ball together etc. In first year I told him I liked him but things went rubbish and we fell out before I found out what he felt. Then last year we had a very stormy year, falling out all the time but still somehow remaining close. Now it's our last year in uni and facing the possibilty of not seeing him again I have realised I'm in fact in love with him, just never realised. Thing is he has just met this girl, who he is mad for and I don't want to say anything because I want to see where things go with this girl and him. I don't want to wreck it for him. But feeling this way is driving me mental. Do I say something and risk our friendship or keep my mouth shut and hope that one day it might work out?I'm so confused! Hope you can help thanks
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2005): I think it is already obvious that he does not have those intense feelings for you, but you still are not sure. I don't think you have any choice but to talk to him, tell him how you feel, and ask him to consider his own feelings towards you. What is she giving him that you do not? Can he possibly find another woman he can argue with, and make up with, and continue to be a friend to as you two have managed to do. Sometimes, finding a partner who knows how to argue with you is one of the best tests of compatibility. Point that out to him. Of course, just because you argue well, and make up okay, does not make a positive relationship. You should both talk about what you want from a partner, with the idea of improving the loving part of a relationship. Maybe then, he will have a change of heart. Good Luck.
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