A
male
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:Things ended with my girlfriend on a bad note. For all we talked, we stopped communicating a long time ago and left too many things unsaid. The last time I saw her the pressure got to me and a lot of them came pouring out. I've tried apologizing, giving her space, talking about anything but that night. We were friends before we became intimate and I like to think we are still friends; she doesn't hate me and still talks via email from time to time.But despite my best efforts, she won't agree to see me and it's been 4 months. Some things she finally revealed (and I think some others she won't say) have apparently made the idea of seeing me uncomfortable to her. I told her I'd wait but just want to know what's going on (said in a nicer way). The fact she hasn't responded I think tells me all I need to know. I really would wait for her but all my friends (and even some of her peers) are telling me it's time I simply accept the ineveitable and move on. But she was the love of my life and it's hard to let go. As the old saying goes I don't want to burn any bridges but I need to move on. Should I send her a "goodbye" letter or should I just fade away?
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female
reader, quiet-echo  + ♥, writes (15 July 2009):
 Let her be for now. The lines of communication are still open. Some people just take longer than others to sort through things and that might be all she needs here. Maintain your own value by not chasing her.
On the other hand she may be reluctant to get together in person if she thinks she’s going to be faced with ‘the big talk’. You’ve said what you can. You’ve apologized for your role. Now let the wound heal and stop picking at it.
xcharlottex's suggestion is a good one. Get everyting our in a letter, but do NOT send it.
Best of luck to you.
A
female
reader, xcharlottex  +, writes (14 July 2009):
leave things as they are. Write a letter, but don't send it,(just pretend you're writing the letter to her) with all your feelings and things left unsaid, to get it out of your system. Don't speak to her, let her come to you if she wants to see/speak to you.
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