A
female
age
41-50,
*nionskin
writes:How do I tell my bf of 5 years that I want to continue saving for a home, but I want a life too? Everytime I want to do something (e.g. go away for a long weekend) he says we can't afford it... I am so young and I feel like I have no life. We have been on a few holidays, but none of them have lasted more than about 5 days, and I have basically had to beg and plead to get him to go. I know he is only trying to do what is best for us, and I KNOW how important saving is, I have always been a saver, but I feel like the best years of my life are slipping by and I am missing out on so much. He lived his life to the absolute fullest when he was in his 20's (he's in his 40's now), and now he has run out of time and needs to save save save, and I feel like I am being held back. I feel as if he isn't willing to compromise I will have to end it, but I don't want to. How do I handle this? I don't want to end a wonderful relationship over money :(
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): Go on a break. See someone your own age for awhile with different priorities. See if you like it better, or if you were happier with your guy. Just a suggestion. You two have no kids, as far as I can see and are not married. Now is your chance to figure out who you are and what you want before you are stuck. But I'd suggest doing just that. I'm not saying he is right for you or not, obviously I don't know.
A
male
reader, tenfold  +, writes (3 June 2009):
you can do alot TOGETHER without spending so much. Such as going to the beach to watch sunsets. Going someplace nice but a little bit far away. Having a small bbq party at home inviting friends. Going to the pub.
Just don't focus on going to expensive holidays like to hawaii or go on a cruiser.
Best of luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2009): But the thing is, all these things I want to do I want to do with HIM. We never DO ANYTHING! I am so bored and feel like I am missing out on so much life. What's the point of being in a relationship if he is going to buy a home and I am going to go on holidays alone?!!
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A
female
reader, niki20  +, writes (3 June 2009):
 you have to think about if you would like a house or a few days away? which one would you rather have? i personally would go for the house, you can raise a family in it and grow. you two can makw a cute camping trip for cheap, you dont have to go somewere super exclusive, just little gataways even if its in a hotel room a block away. :)
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