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*irbyK
writes: My BF and I have been together almost 2 years and have been friends for 9 years and both love each other a lot. My problem is that he doesn't want to live with me. I'm 26 and he's 28 and have both lived with long term partners before. I currently live 40 mins away.I have 2 reasons to live together, one is becasue I want to take our relationship to that next level and two, I now work in the city full time and need to move closer to work. It seems pointless and a waste of money to get my own place becuase he likes me to stay at his place 4 nights a week. He doesn't visit me and I do all the driving.I confronted him about it (unfortunately when he was really tired and grumpy at the time) and he said if he lives with me he thinks he won't see his friends. I don't believe this because I have a busy life myself and have never stopped him spending times with his mates.How can I explain to him that things will be better if I am live-in rather than a visitor, or am I just being selfish?
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2005): You are NOT being selfish. It almost sounds like he is taking advantage of you. Have you ever been too tired or had other things to do then to drive ot his place?? Always just been there?? Men like to do a little chasing. It is in their nature. If he doesn't want to live with you then maybe you are wasting your time or maybe you just need him to realize on his own what he truly wants. I am not suggesting stupid games but men are a little dense and need help sometimes, and women make themselves too available to be taken advantage of at times.
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