A
male
age
30-35,
*ON_499
writes:my best friend cant walk and so she is in a wheelchair.i still really love her and have also told her but she told me that she would just be a burden to me and so she doesn't want to get into a relationship with me.however she has told me that she loves me but because of her disability she thinks that i will not be able to be happy with her.what should i do to convince her?
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2008): She's quite right - she would be a burden to you, but if that burden is one that you're willing to carry then there shouldn't be a problem.
You don't say how long she's used a wheelchair or what caused her to be in it which would help me answer better. If this is a recent thing then she's very likely feeling sorry for herself and depressed about the whole thing. All you can do is treat her just the same as if she were walking, and hopefully sooner or later she'll realise you're there to stay, and that you consider her disability as nothing more than a slight inconvenience - if that's how you see it.
Ask her what she thinks the difficulties are. She knows how much care she needs from others and will have a much better idea of the practicalities of her life than you have. If you can see yourself overcoming those difficulties, and most can be worked around somehow, you'll need to demonstrate to her that you could cope with them all.
After a very bad accident, I used a wheelchair for almost a year myself, and I wasn't sure if I'd ever walk again, so I have a pretty good idea of what's going through her mind.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2008): hey.......
jus tell her that you really love a lot.....
buy her a gift or something which she really likes
or just take a buch of red roses and fall down at her feet!
and trust me ..., it'll surely work...
i too shall pray for you. good luck.
...............................
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