A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i'm worried about how my girlfriend feels because i don't give her oral sex. we've been together 4 months and having sex for 3. she has never said anything about it but i really want to please her but it disgusts me even thinking about doing it. my first experience of giving oral sex was fine but i done it a couple of occassions after and i hated it. how can i get over this? what can i do?
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female
reader, auntie donna  +, writes (7 September 2007):
 You need to tell her how you feel. I'm sure she'll understand. And why are you letting a couple of bad experiences put you off. Try going down on her and if you still dont enjoy it then tell her. You never know you may supprise yourself. Good luck and let me know how it goes.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2007): It's an aquired taste. You should at least try it for a while. You may just come to like her response.
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (5 September 2007):
 Lets not jump to conclusions. Just because he does not like giving oral sex does not mean he can't ask for it. At the same time she's not obligated to perform. One does not equal the other and it's not tit for tat. His girlfriend might not mind giving it to him whether he returns the favor or not. Some of the replies equate his dislike for performing oral, the basis for her to get even and not perform either.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2007): The last poster gave some great advice. One tip, though: If you're not willing to give it, then don't ask for it. If you refuse to give your gf oral, then do NOT ask her to go down on you. Not only is it unfair, but she'll be expecting you to return the favor. Of course...if you talk to her about it, she might be ok with just giving and no recieving. You'll have to ask.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2007): There is nothing wrong with not enjoying oral sex - why not be honest about it - I am sure your girlfriend picks up on your feelings about it and would probably be relieved to discuss it openly. It is not as if it is essential to good sex - maybe you both would enjoy more playful alternatives - gel and vibrators? You might have a good giggle with that. If it was me I would absolutely not want you to be doing oral sex without a strong desire for it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2007): Well don't expect oral sex from her than, I wouldn't give an guy oral sex if he wouldn't give it back. Maybe your gay
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2007): First off, why do something you are not comfortable with when she didn't ask for it in the first place? There are other means of satisfying her apart from oral sex.With that said, what do you hate about oral sex? If it's a hygiene issue, then there are remedies... Like taking a shower together before doing it, or just making sure she's 'clean' down there.Or you could be more playful by adding some things to spice things up... Like whip cream, or chocolates, or wine for that matter.If it's the act you don't like, then talk to her about it. She might feel the same when returning the complement. So open it up with her. Best you talk to her about it rather than it becomes a chore for you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2007): If you hate it, you hate it and there's not a lot you can do other than explain to your girlfriend that it's just not something you can do. She needs to respect that it's not something you feel comfortable with and really, that's all there is to it! Do reassure her that it's the act and NOT her that disgusts you though so she doesn't feel rejected or self-conscious.
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