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I fell for him but its a long distance relationship

Tagged as: Long distance, Social Media<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 January 2022) 2 Answers - (Newest, 11 January 2022)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

While traveling to Chicago back in June, I connected with "Z" on Bumble. We decided to meet at his place, kissed in the first hour, and I slept over. It all seemed casual and fine. I visited again in July, and the two of us had the most amazing, intimate weekend together.

Now, we talk on the phone all the time. One day, I sent Z a picture of my parents traveling in Iceland. His response was that he and I should go there ourselves. On a bit of a whim, we've now booked flights and are planning this trip together. The only problem is that now all I can think is that I shouldn't be seeing him again because he's in Chicago and I'm in California. I did fall for him. I don't know what to do. Please help!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2022):

You move pretty fast, and you are far too trusting of people you hardly know.

You are staying overnight with someone you've recently contacted online; and you're already travel companions upon only two in-person meetings over the span of a month. How many people you know are aware you're seeing this guy? This is how missing-persons stories begin.

I suggest you slow your roll, my dear!

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (9 January 2022):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntSweetheart, if your profile age is correct, you have been round the block more than once and should have the experience and common sense to be a little more guarded who you "fall for". You feel you have "fallen for him" based on the strength of two meetings and a few phone chats. I am sure he is very charming and affectionate, but ANYONE can keep that up for two short meetings. You know next to nothing about this guy, only what he has chosen to tell you - and even that may not be true.

I would caution against going on a long trip with someone you have only met briefly. What if you find out, while out there, that he is not what you thought? That he is, in fact, not a very nice person? You would be stuck with a virtual stranger for the remainder of the trip. Worst case scenario, you could be putting yourself in danger.

Unless either of you can be flexible in the future and move to where the other one resides, there really is little point in prolonging this liaison. While your head is full of thoughts of him, you are not available to meet someone more suitable.

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