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I don't want to be 40 and alone but I can't get a girlfriend!

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 June 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 19 June 2011)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hey everyone.

I'm starting to get a little worried about the way things are going. I'm 23 years old. I'm friendly, maybe a little shy but i can come out of my shell quickly, i go to the gym a few times a week (i'm trying hard with that stuff right now) although i don't think i'm some Justin Timberlake or anything i've been told i do look attractive.

Problem is i just can't seem to get a girlfriend. I went to the movies tonight with two of my friends who are girls. They are both in relationships, I do like the one girl but i'd never get involved if she's got a guy. I don't talk to them about relationships and stuff much because it's not that easy to be telling someone about my total uselessness and lack of experience at 23 years old. But i've been watching them trying to learn more about girls generally, what they like/look for etc. Maybe there's something new to find out, maybe it can help me i'm not too sure.

I mean i have lots of friends too, of all different types. I'm generally easy to get along with, i try to be as confident as i can. Tonight i saw a few cases of guys on dates with a girl, and i don't look any worse than them. And the girl(s) they were with were pretty hot, i'd give anything to be where they were. Why dosen't it work for me? I'm getting older all the time, and i don't want to be living alone when i'm 40.

:(

View related questions: get a girlfriend, shy

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2011):

Do your friends know anyone who they can set you up with?

Are you involved with any kind of clubs or organizations?

Both are great ways to meet people. Even if your dates never turn out well, you at least learn what type of woman you don't want to be with -- and that makes it easier to find someone you do want to be with.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

jmc930:-

i see your point. but yesterday at the movies was just a spur of the moment, i hang out with all different types of people in different places. that's the problem, i'm fresh out of ideas. and nothing i've tried has gotten me anywhere.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2011):

If you're desperately looking for a girlfriend, you probably won't get one worth sticking with for very long. Good things come to those who wait, and it will feel "natural."

Another problem: you're going places in public with girls already. You don't look available. And the girls you're going places with have boyfriends. Again, this isn't going to get you a relationship.

Try going out with a few guy friends or hang out in other places than ones you normally frequent (coffeeshops, bookstores, heck, your university's student union?).

You're nowhere near 40, so you have nothing to worry about.

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A female reader, Star xxx United Kingdom +, writes (16 June 2011):

Star xxx agony auntOh hun you are still very young and you seem to be putting so much pressure on yourself to find a girlfriend..

Chillax a little you usually find when you are looking there is no one around and when you stop ....bingo.

Just got out and enjoy yourself put yourself out there but without the pressure.

Just be you yourself, there is someone out there for all of us.

Take care xx

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