A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello! Little help please!been with bf four years, truly amazing man. Does everything and anything he can for me, to losing weight (yes men can do it!), growing his hair and pretty much anything really. People say im so lucky to be with him.And yet I have contstantly had doubts about him/us and lked other men too (none of which I have gone with) Surely if you love someone and are happy you shouldnt doubt if you love them?Sex-life is pants-for me. Dont want it-or ne type of affection with him (dosnt stop me from thinkin about it with other men tho) Sometimes wonder if I have stayed with him coz im scared of being single again and not finding any1 as nice. I am vey indecisive and often need alot of advice so need lots plez! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2009): I believe we are able to meet the needs of another if or when our own needs are being met, it is normal if one gives more when they are the giving kind: their need to give will help balance. True love is when both of you have your needs met. Yes, our needs will change as the relationship changes, and we need to tell our partners as this happens to allow them to recognise and adjust. By not telling your partner of your changes or inability to meet their needs, you are doing damage to the trust in this and other relationships. Couples should be fair to each other, even if the relationship does work out. TRUST and CARE enough to tell.
A
female
reader, Missmchief +, writes (9 February 2009):
I feel exactly the same. It's like a choice between safe and reliable and exciting and new. I'm going to tell my guy how I feel sparing no details and then ask him what he wants to do. It's only fair to be honest I guess. Maybe you should try doing the same? If you don't tell him what's wrong then he can't do anything to make it better. And he can't fault you for being straightforward and upfront. X
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2009): Sounds like the "grass is greener syndrome"
You have to follow your heart, and if your not happy with him...then your not happy. You can't make yourself love someone!
But, by leaving him you are taking a risk and possibly realizing your fears.
Through most of my life I feared being alone. And now..I am alone and I love it! And although I am in love, I do not want to live with this person. I want my own space! My feelings about that may change at a later date, but I don't think so. I have been living alone for two years now. For the first time in my life I feel as though I have control of my life! So don't worry so much about being alone, and at your age...the chances of being alone for very long are slim!
If you don't love him anymore, it's only fair that you let him know.
I wish you luck whatever you decide to do.
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