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female
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anonymous
writes: I have been engaged for 2 and half years and with my fiance for 6 and half years. The problem is I have a really low sex drive (I mean once every 5 months). He is very understanding and as we both work long hours and are tired alot anyway the subject doesn't come up that often. I am 27 and I am worried that my marriage is not going to work because of this. He does not make me feel sexy just like a housewife already! Any suggestions?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2006): An aspect to a successful sex life is that your partner continues to make you feel sexy. You need to suggest this to him and talk about things you can do to make yourself feel sexier. Perhaps he could be more affectionate (affection not involving sex), perhaps he could make more positive comments about the way you look, perhaps you could go out more, perhaps you could talk about what clothes make you feel sexy and turn him on. Perhaps you could talk about the intimate moments you have leading up to sex that could be improved.
As for your sex drive, have you always only been interested in sex every 5 months or is it more of a problem now? is it something you are happy with, or is it something you want to change?
As a couple you need to make time when neither of you are too tired. You NEED to have time where you can be relaxed, comfortable and can experiment with the things I have suggested. I bet he is just as keen as you are to improve things and I bet, despite the seeming lack of interest he would be interested in changing things too.
Good luck!
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