A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am in a relationship with a girl i care very much about. I believe she cares about me as she has told me but she is totally oblivious to making any effort in the relationship where it really counts and believes that just by turning up at the weekend (the only time we get to see each other)is enough. I genuinly believe this is just her nature but i find it soul detroying to be with someone who i have to constantly chase, make plans, make contact with, and always have to ask for some affection in terms of a cuddle or a kiss as she is never forthcoming. Does anyone out there know how best to handle this situation. I don't really want to break up with her as we do get on very well but i am spending more and more time questioning why she makes me feel so unwanted and a low priority when deep down i think she really likes being with me. Can anyone help me here and tell me what to do or how i should feel and act as i am getting more and more hurt the longer it goes on. I just want to be in a equal relationship where i dont have to try so hard and feel so bad Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, miso31  +, writes (27 August 2008):
How long have you been dating? That's important because if it's at the very beginning she may still be warming up, trying to figure things out and how she feels. If it's been a while, and her behavior has recently changed, I think you have a bigger problem on your hands. Of course what you need to do is talk to her. Just say how you express feelings for someone is making plans, initiating affection, and it's difficult for you to be dating someone who doesn't express themselves in that way. You may just have ask her how she thinks things are going with the two of you as well? You really don't want to be with someone who is emotionally/physically checked out - it's just not fair to you. You need some explanation and if she's not forthcoming, you might want to tell her you need some time apart.
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