A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husband told me I should get a sex buddy on the side because he's not into sex for now.He insisted sex would affect his ability to do well in the gym.I asked him why, and he said there's no-one else, he's just become TOO addicted to the gym, even taking days here and there off work to go to various gyms across the city.He said he can't help it, it's just THE WAY HE IS!(I put that in capital letters as he said it in a loud voice!)He's spending so much time at the gym I feel like we're ships that pass in the night.How could he do this! It's low, real low!I feel like getting counselling but is there anything else I can do to deal with the situation.Is gym addiction one of the biggest addictions and how do I deal with it?cheers, Marie Reply to this Question
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male
reader, baddogbj  +, writes (4 July 2009):
 He's just wrong. If he is looking to get stronger then going to the gym everyday is wholly counter-productive unless of course he is taking steroids and training like a 1980s East-German weightlifter.
When I was young I used to compete at a national level in powerlifting and even now at 40 I could qualify for my national championships without much effort if I chose to. I go to the gym about 4 times a month, at most, because it is the rest and recovery between training sessions that make you stronger not the time spent in the gym.
Yes it is not a great idea to have sex less than say 20 hours before you are really going to push yourself in the gym but afterwards sex is exactly what is required to help you rest and get the sleep that you need.
a) ask him to educate himself about what he is doing b) if he is taking steroids then tell him he is an idiot and a loser and c) ask him what on earth is he putting in all the effort for at the gym if it isn't to get more sex.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2009): i think just tell him how it makes u feel and wut he said hurt u and y because this is a bad situation and cousiling might be good for your relation ship
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A
female
reader, marietomates  +, writes (4 July 2009):
 Okay Marie, this sounds kind of weird. My first impulse is to think he's screwing some woman who goes to or works at this gym. Or he's attracted to some woman at the gym and he wants to look hot for her. Men like to have sex. Why doesn't he want to have sex with you? There is a reason and I'm telling you it's not the gym. Is he taking supplements? How about steroids? That can make you moody which would explain him yelling at you that's just the way he is. Has he always been like that? Look for clues about behavior changes - see what you uncover. But something smells fishy. Good luck!
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