A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I recently spent time with my boyfriends family and realised they're sexist, racist, ignorant and rude, and it's very hard to bare now, my boyfriend on the contrary is caring, loving and understanding and we've been together years. I plan on marrying him and having children and i cant stand the idea of my children having that sort of influence from my boyfriends immediate/close family. He's very understanding but how understanding does a person have to be to tell them you don't really like their family? His mum has also made a couple of snipes at me for no reason, i havent done anything to offend her.Any advice as to how i could tell my boyfriend this very lightly? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, LivingWithBadDecisions +, writes (18 March 2013):
 Im not sure. I have a crappy family dinamic(dynamic?) so im sure it will come up many times in my future relationships.if hes different from his family he probably knows how difficult they are when it comes to their opinions so maybe you could just be nice about it and explain that you feel uncomfortable going but youre happy for him to keep going as many times as he wants.I think iamheretohelpyou said it well with : "I really love you and want a future with you, but I would rather not meet with your family more than once or twice a year because I find some of their views quite offensive. This doesn't mean I don't want you or our future children to have as much contact as you and they want with your family."Cooper
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2013): If you plan on getting married and have the engagement ring on tell your future husband your not going to put up with your parents crap. If they insult you or are rude give it right back to them. Tell your man that. If he cannot understand that forget the wedding plans. You don't need his parents emotional baggage in your relationship and it will only get worse or your going to get real pissed and lay punch into his mouthy inconsiderate parents. If you cant get the support from your man now then it aint happening in the future either. Good luck.
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