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female
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anonymous
writes: How do you get closer to a guy who is afraid of a relationship because he got hurt before? I'm 15, he's 16. His friends said he likes me, but we never get past just small talk at school and on the computer.I am scared to be too pushy like ask him to hang out because I am shy and I don't want to scare him. Also, I am so nervous around him I can barely talk. He's not a shy kind of guy though and a lot of girls like him, but he hasn't had a girlfriend in over a year.I want to be more confident around him and hopefully get him to like me more. Also, the weird thing is I didn't even know him at first, he sought me out and started talking to me first. I'm really confused.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2006): You're gonna have to bite the bullet and start talking. He obviously likes you as he is chatting online and at school, but is porobably just scared that he will be made a fool out of and hurt even more if he asks you out and gets rejected. If he hasnt been out with anyone in over a year, he will also be very nervous as he will have lost his confidence around girls. Get chatty with him, and when you feel like you are making a little ground and building a rapport with him, ask him if he wants to see a movie or get a drink (hopefully not alcohol at your age ;-) ) or something. Please trust me, I was 16 once. If he sought you out, then he surely must like you, as it probably took all his nerve to do that. Now you have to do the same for him. Hope it all goes well, and remember, be confident, not shy, you already know him...it's no big deal to go up to him.
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