A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi all, I have been in an on/ off relationship with a commitment phobe.I have read up all about his symptoms and he matches exactly and his actions are that of a commtiment phobe. Please can you advise on how to deal with such a person, as I am really struggling. Thanks xx Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all. I think it is time for me to move on.xx
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (23 November 2010):
You can't really deal with someone who is a commitment phobe, and that's the problem. Anything that you say or do really won't make a difference. If someone wants to change, they will do it for their own sakes. So, if this guy really wanted to commit, he would have addressed his own issues. As it is, he's not. Therefore he has no real intention of changing. I can only echo the calls of the other posters, which is that if you want real, long term commitment, you will need to move on from him.
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A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (23 November 2010):
 It depends on the type of commitment phobe. Some will be perfectly happy in a monogomous relationship as long as it's not "defined." Others will be cheaters and out trying to get every piece of tail they can.
You need to decide what you want. If you want commitment, then there is nothing you can do and you should leave. Can you be content sitting on this fence?
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A
male
reader, Dr.LanceMerryweather +, writes (23 November 2010):
 I hate saying this Madam, but I believe he doesn't have sufficient feeling for you - plain and simple. If he did, there wouldn't be all this 'on-off' business. You both have become a habit to eachother and as a result, firm friends. Unfortunately, a good friendship doesn't make for a long-term, fully committed relationship.
I would personally strongly consider my other options. Good luck.
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