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How do I tell my girlfriend to stop grabbing me in public?

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Question - (29 January 2009) 6 Answers - (Newest, 2 February 2009)
A male United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Okay I need a little help. Me and my gf have been going out for over a year and I really like her and she does too..

Now I don't mind pda (public displays of affection), like holding hands, hugging, or making out but she just goes a little too far. I don't mind her grabbing and feeling on me but I don't want her to do that in public. She's always trying to grab and feel on my penis where there are like a bunch of people there and it's really embarrassing, it's even more embarrassing when I get hard in front of everybody.

So please how do I tell her to lay off a little bit without hurting her feelings???

thxz

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A female reader, im_a_dummy United States +, writes (2 February 2009):

im_a_dummy agony auntwell.. its not the best way to deal with things, but if talking doesnt work, its because she probably doesnt realize how embarrassing it really is, so dont like, push her boobs out so they can see it.. but like deffinantly make it noticable what you are doing, and maybe she will realize it... and when she gets mad at you for doing that, just be like "i am sorry you can blame me though, i just get this really tough urge to do it." ha... if that doesnt work let me know!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2009):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

ok i tlked to my grl friend and she kinda got mad.. she said its not her fault.. she juss has a really tough urge to do that, and that i shouldnt blame her...so oo i told her she could still do it

and now im gonna try your idea "im_a_dummy"

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2009):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

alright thkz.. i think ill juss talk to her

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A female reader, im_a_dummy United States +, writes (29 January 2009):

im_a_dummy agony auntwell, if you really cant seem to find it in you to talk to her, you can do what my friend did. He felt up his girlfriend in public and started playing with her boobs, like not so that they were showing, but so that people could tell, and she started blushing... then when she was talking to him about it, she was like telling him how embarrassing that was that she was really enjoying herself with an audiance, and he was just like, well hey.. thats how i feel when you do ____________. and they worked it out, and they are all good now. i think talking to her is a better way to deal with it, but you could also do that.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2009):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

yeah we've been going out for a year(its basically like that) but we were kinda taking it really slow, i said a year because we were really close friends-fwb"s(friends with benifits) for like seven months..we weren't really dating but we did things 2gether

but we finally tried beying boyfriend and girlfriend and made it official, and we decided to take it slow and really see how much we really like each other and really do

the whole grabbing thing was the only problem..and juss hate making her mad,

but i guess she;ll understand

thxz emily

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A female reader, Emilysanswers United Kingdom +, writes (29 January 2009):

Just tell her that you find it really humiliating when she does it. Point out that she wouldn't like it if you groped her chest in front of people.

Give her the puppy eyes when you tell her.

This is the kind of thing you really should be able to talk about after a year together.

Good Luck!! xx

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