A
male
age
41-50,
tastyfrzz
writes:My first marriage of 13 years was to a lovely woman I met in college (my first true girlfriend) who unfortunately was a child victim of sexual abuse from age 5 to 13. This came up 1 year after we were married. It led to her being committed for several months and although I went to private and group counceling sessions both with and without her we never were able to make it work. The therapist even finally said to throw-in-the-towel. Now here I am 10 years later. Still alone allbeit with a 17 year old son who will be graduating next spring. I'm not sure what to do. The online dating schemes don't appeal to me, nor do bars or church socials. I don't want to be alone but I'm deathly afraid of going through all of that pain again. Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, baby duck + ♥, writes (7 October 2007):
 One way to meet people for potential relationships is seeing them at places you like to frequent. If I were back in the dating game, I would meet people at the gym, the track, college, work, and where I run errands ... because those are the places where I go. You're right to stay away from the club scene and church socials, because what is the point of meeting someone there, if you don't want to spend time with her there?
Most of my single friends have met 'dates' at work, through friends, or running errands (like the grocery store or cleaners,etc). It sounds odd, but if you make a point to talk to women in these places, at least you can build up some confidence. Good luck to you!
A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (6 October 2007):
It's all in the numbers. You need to meet and ask out 100 women to find just one who clicks with you. You can't say you don't like meeting women in certain ways. At that rate you'll never find a gf.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2007): Hi there its good to hear that you feel ready to look for love and friendship. It is a very scary business and always a risk that some hurt will be involved, but always worth the risk I think for just what you may find round the corner. You don`t like clubs etc, but is there some friends that perhaps could introduce you to some of their friends and perhaps a friendship might blossom into romance along the way, but if it doesn`t at least you will have made a whole load of new friends!!! Godd luck
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