A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I want to write a list of good and bad things about my best friend. We're both 18 and I want to show them the good points, but there are a couple of things that need to be improved and I don't want them to feel under attack because they tend to get defensive for no reason, but it's the way they've been brought up. My problem is that I don't know where to start. How do I make a list if they're not very soppy (I'm not either but it tends to be slightly emotional stuff so it can come across a bit soppy......) So what do I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2012): Your list sounds a bit like a teacher giving ticks on a school report.
If there are some things about your friend then bring this up. You could just say the things you like about him/her and then say but... and bring up one of the things you find difficult.
You don't have to be critical. You can use phrases like:
When you... I feel
I find it difficult when you
That way, you acknowledge that you find these things hard to cope with. Others may not.
Hope this helps.
A
female
reader, Echo85  +, writes (18 April 2012):
 Why do you want to write this list? What point are you trying to make?
The 'bad points', do you intend to tell them to change them? If they take offence what then?
Would you want them to tell you what your bad points are? I don't understand your reasoning.
I don't know what advice to give you apart from this is a very bad idea. Everybody has good and bad points. You love and are friends with them because of these.
Good luck
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