A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I am 19 years old and I was in a relationship with a narrcissist for a year. Its been 5 months almost now since I ended it and havent yet recovered. I am lost as to what to do. I still feel emotionaly ruined. I dont feel normal. I dont feel like i used to before i met him. Will i ever get that back? if so how? ive spent sooo many nights crying about so many things in relation to my ex narrcissistic bf. I go from being angry and hating him for what he did, to actually feeling sorry for him, to missing him and wanting him back, to feeling ok then to feeling so angry at myself for ignoring the signs of abuse and letting him do it to me...and then i go back to the start again, having so much anger towards him. I just dont know how ot get past all this. How do i get to the state of being ok with life? to feeling normal? i jsut feel like a completely different person now, compared to how i was before i met him. before, i was so innocent and positive about things in life, 1 year and 5 months later, he has stolen my innocence from me (he actually said that 'haaha ive stolen your innocence') and i feel so down and negative all the time. help! i feel like im going insane with all of this. i honesryl dont think i can beguin to explain what i went through and how i feel.
View related questions:
my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (16 December 2007):
 This is difficult. Let me tell you something about innocence. It's precious, and sound like you feel as if it was a mistake, maybe it was, but does loosing you innocence really change who you are as a person.
You still have the power to determine who you are. This experience will bring strength to you, because now you know what characteristics to watch out for in picking a partner.
What you have to do is forgive him. Believe it or not it works. Not because he deserves it but because you deserve to live and be happy without an after affect of what his behavior caused. Also realize his behavior is a mental condition. I look at the blame with these folks the same as not judging someone because they can't get out of a wheelchair to pick something up. You may not like what we did, but don't hold hate for what someone else does. You still have the power to choose how you let it affect you and if you choose to remain in contact with people who do wrong. It's up to you and healing is up to you as well.
Take care.
|
