A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, Just wondering if anyone has any advice on how i can change from being cold hearted.I know im like this from being messed around by men (aswell as seeing me father treat my mother badly from a young age) and it stops me from developing relationships. I go on dates etc but always back away or find things wrong with the fella and i dont want to do this anymore. I want to take risks and not be afraid to be hurt and i also want to be happy in relationship......but i dont know what to do to get rid of this cold heartedness that wont let me connect fully to someone. so any advice will be appreciated and please dont say go to a counsellor. Thanks
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, mrswaldhauser +, writes (14 January 2013):
 My advice would be, wait until you find that special person. You cannot control your heart, none of us can. Even though you feel you are cold hearted because of what you saw growing up and your experience of relationships so far doesn't mean you will always be this way. We are human and one of our most amazing qualities is the ability to love. When I met my husband I couldn't help the butterflies or the nervousness and had been hurt very badly previous to that and shut myself down for a time. But I found my soulmate and I just couldn't help myself! Now we are married and have our first baby and couldn't be happier :) Don't fret too much. When you meet someone special your emotions will take over even if you don't think you can.
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