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His job means we keep moving, but it's not good for my children

Tagged as: Family, Marriage problems<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 May 2008) 1 Answers - (Newest, 4 May 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, *isti Hdz writes:

hello all. I need some advice on my marriage.

I have been with my husband for almost 5 years, and we are very happy together, we have almost the perfect marriage. The problem is his job. He works in agriculture, which has us moving all over God's creation. We are in 4 states every year, due to his job. When we got together I liked it, I loved traveling and saw some things I had never seen before, like beaches, and palm trees, and mountain look-outs, but now we have kids and my oldest will start school this year.

Like I said we are a happy couple but I can no longer move because I don't want to switch my children to a different school every 4 months. I did as a child and it has a lot of impact on a child mentally. But also I don't think that our marriage would work if I only saw him 3-4 months out of a year.

I am willing to try I am not even thinking about calling it quits. I love him so much, I want to grow old with him, and having a father in my childrens life is very important to me. But how will it affect my children when he leaves for 8 months and then comes back and we are together for a while and then he is gone again. Plaese help me I have tried and tried to discuss this with him, and he says that he will settle down when the kids start school, but the other day I told him that I was going to settle down this year in Delaware because he has more work here, and he said that he is starting to dislike the way the work is here and the way the pay is, but I think that it is because he doesn't realy want to settle down. This is what he has done for 13 years, this is all he knows, and I understand that he won't be an easy change for him, but what can I do I love him, but I love my babies more.

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A female reader, all i need United States +, writes (4 May 2008):

first off have you considered homeschooling them,? i am actually a product of home school. well i started in a private school pre-school-4th grade moved on to public 5th-half of 10th grade and made the decision my self to try homeschooling. i started my sophmore year and personally i would never go back to public or private school. so much drama and all the bad things that go on in public schools these days, its awful...

and if you dont like the homeschooling idea then all you can do is try and talk it over to your husband. and your right, he probablly doesnt want to settle down if hes done nothing else for 13 years, it s probablly just diffucult for him. but he needs to understand what it would do to your children...

i wish you the best...

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