A
female
age
30-35,
*iss_Clairee
writes:Me and my boyfriend had been going out for four months and the relationship was perfect. Saw each other often (although not every single day), did things together so we weren't always stuck in and we both said we loved each other alot.Last friday he stayed over at mine so he didn't have to travel all the way back to his house after a night out. During this time he texted me saying he loved me so much and when he got back told me the same thing, too me it was the perfect night. Things on saturday was also fine. However on sunday as soon as i woke up at his he was acting strange and wasn't his normal self. Whilst he was driving me back to mine i asked him what was wrong and he came out with how his new job that he was starting was an important one and more professional then after a long pause he said that he'd been thinking the past two week how he couldn't really see a long term relationship with me. Obviously i was devastated.I happened to bump into him on the monday and i asked to have a proper talk about it all as we didn't even have the chance on sunday. He then came out with that he was confused and doesn't know what he wants. He's asked for me to wait a week while he decides what he wants. He also admitted that his new job isnt that different after all so that has nothing to do with it.I am really confused myself as hes told me 2 completely different things. Which do i believe? Hes said he wasnt trying to avoid anything by saying he was confused to my face. But if i hadn't have bumped into him would he have even told me about this? So now i have no clue what to do? Shall i wait the week til he lets me know and shall i tell him that hes got to tell me to my face instead of by text or phone? Or should i just tell him not to bother anymore and start moving on? I love him so much and hes the best thing thats ever happened to me but again if we do get back together how do i ensure that i won't be constantly thinking "what if starts thinking like this again" and constantly being on a pedestal!Please help and sorry that its long.
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female
reader, samsmommy  +, writes (20 November 2008):
 I think he probably really does love you, but is afraid of commitment, maybe he's never been in a serious relationship before? I would give him the week, but I would tell him you guys have to meet in person to discuss it. As far as wondering if he'll do this to you again when you guys get back together, you could talk to him about it and tell him you don't want to be strung around, and he needs to figure out what he wants. That was why he wanted the week right?
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