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Help! My mum's boyfriend is molesting me.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 July 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 4 August 2010)
A female South Africa age 26-29, anonymous writes:

ok, so ive asked a few questions on this topic before but i could really use your help on this one! until about 3 months ago my mom's boyfriend has been molesting me (this had been happening for about 3 years and no-one knws about this. i was also sexually molested from the age of 6-9 by another man). My mom's bf is still around and i am terrified of him and being around him. and i blame myself for what ive been through. i have trouble sleeping and freak out inside when im around him yet i still have to smile and act normal on the outside.

My mom or family members or no-one may know about what has happened. Please i could really use any advice on this and advice on how to cope with being around him as i find this just about impossible. thanks for reading and please help me!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2010):

Oh my god girl. You need 2 tell somebody.. You also need evidence.. The same thing happened to me... Your mother might be in denial like mine was but try telling her... I told my best friend in the whole world and she helped me talk 2 my mom bout it that is wat u should do.. Please take my advice and the next time it happens or he comes in your room dont be afraid 2 scream... Or maybe (if you have a phone) text your mom and tell her 2 come in the room while it is happening. maybe she will understand better.

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A female reader, Moo's Mum New Zealand +, writes (1 August 2010):

Moo's Mum agony auntI totally agree with the last poster. If you can't tell a family member for some reason please tell a teacher or a friends mother or father someone you can trust. You do not deserve this and it MUST be stopped.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2010):

Hi,

Your not to be blamed for your circumstances, its THE situation.....

YOU WANT TO PROTECT YOURSELF... FIGHT BACK AND CONFRONT HIM AND YOUR SITUATION.. is he still molesting you

- FIRST Confront him then SECRETLY TAPE-RECORD THE WHOLE CONVERSATION.. (u can use the mp3 or cellphone...) to use as evidence

- meet up with ur closest relative.. "normally i would pick my father over mother... depends on u.. it can be the grandparents..."

... posting here ws the first step

... know take the second step to defend ur self and ur saftey

... the only person u should think about is ur self

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2010):

Hi,

I tell your mom the truth and if you have a father than tell him the truth, and cry when your telling them about your situation. Trust me, you dont deserve this.

I went through the same thing and i know my mother woundnt trust me .. so i told my father the truth and my grandparents and cried when informed them what i was going through. It was scary being 15. However in the end everything worked our fine. My dad took care of my mother and her boyfriend for me. my mother made me feel guilty, BUT i didn't deserve that kind of life, and neither do you. Tell your father or grandparents first. Than your mother.

1st: tell your father and grandparents and "make" them do something .. dont wry tears will come naturally when ur talking

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