A
female
age
30-35,
*tebbinschick
writes:I recently got married to the father of my 2 month year old son. I thought everything was perfect, but to my surprise... there were many things that I did not know about. We've been together since we were 17 years old, and now we are both 21. He has wanted a baby for as long as I can remember, but I never got pregnant. We've had our ups and downs like all relationships do. I haven't always been faithful, but that was while we were only dating. He's not so innocent himself, so I guess we were pretty much even. During my pregnancy he went behind my back and talked to my younger underage sister. It wasn't anything real big, or that inappropriate... but that is besides the point. He also went to one of my friends, and had asked her to do some certain things... which of course she denied him. So he has hurt me pretty bad.. doing that with someone in my family as well as one of my friends. I didn't find all this out until after a couple weeks after we had our son, and after I had already said "I do". I love him dearly... and we've been working through things. The thing is, I can't seem to get over it. I want to be able to move on... but how could he do that while I was carrying our son? How can I get over what has happened?
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reader, mulattoman +, writes (3 September 2009):
 "He's not so innocent himself, so I guess we were pretty much even."
That statement alone shows how immature both of you were. I hope you two get over spiteful attitudes like this QUICKLY or you may as well go your seperate ways NOW.
You two are tying to be a married couple at such a young age and having a baby already? He is not mature enough to handle an exclusive relationship. He obviously wants to experiment with other women instead of being locked down with you. If I had to guess he only married you for the sake of the kid or to impress both families that he can be a man. Truth is, he obviously isn't a man.
Tell him to act straight or you're leaving. Don't hurt yourself for the sake of your child. That is total bull shit. Either he's going to be a great father or husband or he isn't. Forcing yourself in a relationship isn't going to change how good he treats you or the kid.
A
female
reader, brinni_babe  +, writes (3 September 2009):
Firstly, Congratulations with the wedding and the birth of your son. I’m really sorry for what happened. It must have really hurt you, but make shore your son doesn’t get neglected lick some people do but I have a strong feeling that your there for you son and husband 100%.
I agree what your husband did was wrong but it’s sometimes better to find one fault in yourself then to find a million in others, lick you have done. I image you to being a good role model.
It will tack a lot of time to be able to move on, all I can really say is don’t let it haunt you because it could put a mass of strain on your relationship. Try to take your mind of it so it will be less in your memories, the heartache you must feel I can image it to be immensely horrid, and only time can cure.
I hope this helps, and that you have a secure marriage.
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