A
female
age
30-35,
*ervy
writes:Hi Guys,My boyfriend is not keen on going on holidays, ever. Not even to our beach houses (ie. its not cost that's a factor). I would love nothing more than for us to be able to go away, interstate, maybe overseas, but it just seems like it won't happen. He's been overseas before, with his ex girlfriend (grr!) and his family. I love going camping - he doesn't hate it, but he doesn't love it like I do.Before you all say 'go away with a girlfriend instead', it's not the going away that I want. I want to go away with him, and spend time together someplace different. He, on the other hand just wants to stay at home.We only ever go away for a max of 3 days (maybe 4 if I'm really lucky!), and I always feel like it's begrudgingly. We do have fun when we go away, but he always wants to get back.It's really getting me down, I don't want to force him to go away with me, but I feel like it's something that's really important to me. Should I just be grateful that we go away at all, and give up on my aspirations for an interstate/international holiday? Sometimes I feel like I'm being greedy, but on the other hand, at home he normally gets what he wants.How can I modify my thoughts or behaviour to be in a better place with this situation?THANKS AUNTS!
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female
reader, mervy +, writes (13 November 2011):
mervy is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks girls,
Really good adivce, I have tried talking to him about it so he does understand how important it is. Unfortunately there's nothing that I begrudgingly do to bargain with!!
Guess i'll just keep trying to reach a compromise.
Thanks for the tips!
A
female
reader, kate28  +, writes (13 November 2011):
Have you explained to him how important this is to you? I would explain to him how much this means to you, and see how he responds. Is there something he likes to do that you aren't all that into that you could agree to compromise on for him if he is willing to travel more with you?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2011): Thats just a personality clash, hes a homebird and your an adventurer.
Is there a compramise - it doesnt sound like it, if he goes away under duress and just wants to get home you will just feel dissatisfied. If he's been there done that with his ex then he's got to the settling down in routine mode and you still have the wanderlust.
You both have to adjust your thoughts, NOT just you, you have to decide if being with him and only having short breaks that he does grudgingly are better than not having him. And he has to realise that being adventurous is important to you and how you are.Then see if you can both reach a compramise.
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