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female
,
anonymous
writes: I have been with my boyfriend for two years now. Things have been great and we really love each other.The problem is I can not get over his sexaul past. We both have a sexual past but I can't stand his. It is not any different than mine, but for some reason I obsess over his. he has been with some very loose girls and don't understand why he would have sex with them or even be attracted to them. He doesn't have one bit of a problem with mine so why should his bother me so much. We have to be around some of his ex hook-ups often and I can not stand it. I feel like he is thinking about what it was like when he was with him and all kinds of crazy things. When we first started dating I didn't have a problem at all with this, but the longer we have been together the more it bothers me. I know that it was in his past and it has nothing to do with me but I can't stop thinking about it. Every time I try to talk about it with him he just gets mad. I have so many questions but I get no answers. I don't know what I am wanting to hear from him, but I want him to help me get over this obsession. I am driving myself crazy not to mention grossing myself out with the nasty images I am seeing in my head. I love him very much and I know he loves me, I just need help getting past this problem of mine.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2006): Just sit down and talk with him calmly about this. Tell him how you feel and ask him the questions you want to ask him. When he starts to get angry, don't retaliate. Just try to calm him down and tell him you're not pointing any fingers or thinking he is disgusting or anything, you just have some questions for him. Don't let him know that you obsess on this the way you do. Make it seem like you're curious. No man wants an obsessive girlfriend. (Don't know why, though, we're the best!) I hope everything works out okay for you! Good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2006): The past is just that...the past. Move on.
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