A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Here's the thing, We had a argument which lead to him trying to physically throw me out, and then when i started to fight back he spit on my face. I love him but i feel like he went too far and now i don't think i can stay with him. He said sorry so many times, but i don't trust him, i want too but i just cant. On top of that i live with him. ....mrrr. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2010): Laying hands on you is bad enough, but spitting in your face is the ultimate in disrespect. At this point, a sure break from each other is the least you can do for yourself. Then I would go from there.
A
female
reader, Maria-consuela  +, writes (28 October 2010):
 Please do not stay around and wait for this to escalate.I dealt with sporadic bouts of a similar type of abuse throughout my entire marriage. Spitting in the face, pushing someone out the door with force, water poured on you while your sleeping, being thrown around a room like a rag doll, etc. I justified it, letting enough time pass in between for me to convince myself that if I wasn't actually being hit in the face then it was something I could deal with. I justified it because he always had an excuse, and he could talk until I agreed with him just to get some peace.Of course I screamed at him, and he swore it would never happen again and that he was drunk, or that he didn't remember - but that he was so sorry, begging for forgiveness, hands and knees - the whole act.The only thing I learned from those melodramatic "apologies"..Any 'sorry' without a need or want to change the behaviour in a radical way, means nothing.Having something spit in your face - is embarassing, demoralizing - but having your boyfriend/husband/partner doing it is absolutely devastating. This type of abuse is emotional, physical and psychological - and that action is denotes "I own you, and you are worth nothing."Even if he is sorry, and has apologized - he isn't the first to assault a woman and promise it was the last time. Physical abuse in a relationship is progressive, and before long you will be stuck in a very dangerous situation with very few options.I would suggest ending the relationship for now. Alot of abusive relationships are driven by control, and without you in any controlled state you will be able to view objectively how he reacts. If he lashes out, you know that you need to stay away for good. Either way you need to contact authorities, and talk to your friends and family.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2010): This is awful, disrespectful, and painful. Time to leave.
Alcohol? Other drugs?
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A
female
reader, athena546 +, writes (28 October 2010):
do you remember what happened with chris brown and rhiana LEAVE!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2010): You must leave. any man who lays a hand on a women isn't a man at all. If it happened once it will happen again. Don't go any longer in this relationship. If you don't leave now it will be to late. Don't stay in a abusive relationship, if you do...you will regret it.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (28 October 2010):
 I second that motion..Leave. Any man who tries to hit you then hocks a luggie in your face has no respect for you whatsoever. All the "I'm sorry"'s in the world will not redeem him of his filthy action.
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A
female
reader, followtheblackrabbit  +, writes (28 October 2010):
 Honey...LEAVE! Spitting in someone's face is the ultimate sign of contempt, disrespect, and overall debasement. It's as bad as being hit (some might say it's worse!) This is NOT a man who loves you! AND he tried to physically throw you out...imagine what it'll be like the next time you argue! It's difficult I know but can't you stay with family for a bit? Please? Anywhere away from this...abuser? You have to move out. You have to get away from him. You don't trust him anymore (and you shouldn't) and without trust, how can there be love? You don't deserve this. Not one bit. I don't care who started the fight or who did what-you should not be disrespected like this. Please, leave.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2010): Why are u with him? If he puts his hands on you, i wondr how he talks to u.. Anyway, if u call the law and get a restraining order ur twos place could end up being just your place..lol..
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