A
female
age
36-40,
*tucksharzy
writes:Me and my boyfriend got together when i was 16 and he was 17. We have now been together for just over 7 years and living together for 3 years. 6 months befor we moved in with each other the sex dried right up. I usually get sex once a week but i find i have a high sex drive and when dont get it for a day i start begging for it n do anything to make my boyfriend get turned on but nothing seems to work. I constantly find face washers and others items been used for him to ejaculate in. He seems to prefer looking at porn and masterbating than wanting to have sex with me. It makes me feel really ugly, unsexy, unwanted. Ive talked to him about it about it, try to be more kinky, i give him head all the time to try get him to want to have sex but nothing works. Im stuck can any one help me with ideas on what i can do please i love him so much and im desperate to get things back to how they were
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ejaculate, moved in, porn, sex drive Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, truffle31  +, writes (8 December 2010):
I disagree with giving him an ultimatum. I am a 22 year old male and I have such a high sex drive that I actually watch porn and masturbate 1-2 times a day on porn, and have sex 2-3 times with my girlfriend (I've been living with her for 5 months) every single day.
I personally see porn as a habit that I love (although its not that healthy) doing every day, and I also view my girlfriend as the sexiest girl in the world. I love having sex with her, and I love her even more than anything!
I believe that if he would masturbate that much (as you said) to porn, and neglect you till the point where you guys are having difficulties to even have sex once a week (AND living together) you are having a serious problem.
The moment I stopped having sex with my ex was the moment I stopped loving her but hey, everybody's different and you should talk it out with him. Ask him why he does not want to have sex with you regularly, and ask him what you can do to salvage the sexual relationship.
A piece of advice, try wearing different clothes, changing your fashion to something he likes. My girlfriend used to wear gym pants and t shirts, until recently I told her I love tank tops + dresses and heels...once she started to wear them, I just couldn't stop getting her to bed....
A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (8 December 2010):
 Stop giving him head... Demand that he satisfy you, your the one who is lonely and hungry.
If he can't satisfy you sexually, then leave him and find someone else because his problem will not improve.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (8 December 2010):
 Well, things will unlikely ever be the same, unfortunately. If you choose to stick with such a relationship, it may improve at times but probably continue to revert back to you giving "him head" most of the time, except when he is masturbating to pornography, or probably both. Unfortunately, sounds like you will not be getting your jollies very much in such an affair.
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A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (8 December 2010):
 For the most part I talk about porn as really not being the problem and that people over react with it. Here is a case where he obviously can't have both in his life. Porn is fine if it doesn't affect the relationship like it has here.
All I can see you doing is giving him an ultimatum. Either he chooses porn or you and if he chooses porn then I'm very sorry but you are better off without him. If he chooses to give it up and work at the relationship then he is a good guy who may have just fallen into an addiction.
A compromise may work in the future where porn can still be involved but right now I really don't see that working. That's what you have to tell him and I hope that he a good guy.
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